by writer
added 02/01/02

Story: First in a series
Spoilers: No. At least I don't think so
Rating: R

"Oooohh. That's very nice."

"Ummm. Feel good?"

"Yes. Definitely."

"I've been practicing."

"I can ..." -- a pause to exhale slowly and shakily -- "f-feel that." Then, after a moment to consider the situation, the tall wavy-haired woman turns to regard the small redhead with wide eyes and, in the eloquent British accent, replies, "You are an excellent masseuse, Dr. Weaver." Rubbing the spot at the base of her spine, she adds, "I never would have guessed."

Blushing brightly, Kerry drops her practiced, callused hands to her side and shrugs off the compliment. "There are a lot of things my colleagues don't know about me."

Elizabeth smiles and raises an eyebrow, cocking her head in inquiry. "Oh really? Like what, Dr. Weaver? Don't tell me the rumors are true about you sleeping in a coffin."

Kerry winces and shakes her head. "I hadn't heard that one."

Dr. Corday stands and stretches. "I thought that Haleh started that rumor years ago." Then, smiling again, she lightly elbows Weaver. "Hey -- it's just fun. I'm sure no one really hates you."

Kerry smiles good-naturedly and tosses the stethoscope into her locker. "Well, let's hope not."

Behind her, Elizabeth Corday has her hands at her hips and is regarding the small Chief of the ER. She is considering her next words carefully, desperate to get to know the intriguing woman but also afraid of the possible ramifications. Afraid her secret may be known.

"Um, Dr. Weaver ..." -- now a pause to clear her head. "Kerry. Would you like to grab a bite to eat?"

Kerry turns, mostly at the sound of her first name being used by this beautiful woman, but also at the invitation -- so out of character, so unexpected. Someone put her up to this, Kerry thinks as she bites her lip searching for an excuse.

"Um, actually, Dr. Corday, I'm kind of busy, but maybe another -- "

"We could go to Doc Magoo's ..." Corday interrupts, seeing a challenge in Kerry's reluctance. " Just to chat a bit -- and maybe have a spot of tea."

Kerry feels the corners of her lips turn up at the imitation of Mrs. Potts from the well-known Disney film. "Uh, sure, I guess ... why not."

"Good," Elizabeth says, opening her locker and grabbing her coat. "Mark is off tonight, and I don't feel like being bothered with him or either of his daughters." She chuckles and the sound makes Kerry glad she accepted the dinner offer. In all her years practicing at County, she had rarely been on the receiving end of dinner invitations ... until possibly Dr. Morgenstern -- definitely Kim Legaspi.

The thought of her makes Kerry's heart sink and become almost achy. "Ready?" she asks as she tosses on her brown Paddington coat and tries to push thoughts of the blonde psychiatrist out of her mind.

Corday smiles again and Kerry notices the light flush of pink in the Brit's cheeks. "Ready," she repeats and follows Kerry out of the doctor's lounge.

Inside Doc Magoo's Kerry limps to a secluded booth near the back of the eatery and Corday follows her, seating herself across from the charming, ultra-intelligent redhead. Once settled, a waitress arrives to take their drink orders, at which Corday orders the tea as promised and Kerry gets a Diet Coke. Once she scurries away to get their drinks, Elizabeth regards Kerry closely, noticing (not for the first time) how beautiful she is.

"That was a really great massage -- I can't stress that enough," she tells Kerry. "Sometimes I feel as if I am still pregnant. Y'know, sore boobs, achy back, extreme mood swings, and general irritability."

Kerry hopes the dim light of the place masks the blush that comes over her as she imagines massaging Dr. Corday's breasts. Jesus, I must be a sex-starved maniac! she thinks as she thanks the Gods when the waitress returns with the drinks -- a terrific distraction.

"So." Elizabeth rips open two packs of sugar and dumps them into the tea. "How are things going for you? Do you still see Dr. Legaspi?"

Nearly spitting out the sip of Coke she has just taken, Kerry wonders if Elizabeth has been sent by the staff to gather information on her. "Excuse me?" is all she can say as the Brit dabs at her mouth with a napkin.

"Oh." Lowering her voice, Corday knits together her eyebrows. "Was I not supposed to know about that?" She closes her eyes and mouths a distinctly British curse word to herself. "I am so sorry, Kerry. I had no idea -- I was just trying to make conversation." Reaching for Kerry's hand across the table. "Please forgive me -- honestly, I didn't mean to -- "

Interrupting, Kerry smiles and shrugs. "It's okay, really. It wasn't a secret -- it just ... caught me off guard ... I'm ... it's ..." Kerry is at a loss for words and Elizabeth gives her a knowing glance.

"You really loved her, didn't you?"

Kerry is taken aback and still can't respond even when the waitress reappears to get their orders. Elizabeth tells her they are fine for now, and, when she disappears again, Corday turns her attention back to Kerry.

"Dr. Corday ..." Kerry starts to say, but finds she can't finish for several seconds. "... I don't know how comfortable I feel discussing this with you."

Elizabeth is nodding. "I totally understand. If it were me, I'd feel the same way. I just thought that maybe you needed something. I just thought that perhaps, I could ..." Elizabeth looks away, and Kerry is sure something is on her colleague's mind.

"What is it?" Kerry prods gently before meeting a set of smoldering gray eyes.

"I know what Romano says about me behind my back." This is said with a bit of anguish and Kerry resists the urge to take her hand in comfort. "I also know that Mark is totally focused -- not on me, but on whatever Rachel Greene is up to. My career is teetering someplace between extinction and embarrassment, and all I can think of is ... you."

Kerry blinks three times before registering what Elizabeth has said. "Me?" she asks. "What do you mean, me?"

Corday sips the tea, pinky raised in European elegance before turning her attention to Kerry again. "I know I can't blame this on hormones -- postnatal stress -- but lately, I can't stop thinking about you. I can't get you off my mind, and I am absolutely consumed by this."

Kerry Weaver searches her entire brain for a response once, twice, three times, but comes up short in every instance. She wants to help this woman, to console her in some way, to reassure her that this is okay, but she is unable to ignore the warm sensation in the pit of her stomach currently moving downward. Reaching across the table to hold Corday's warm hands within her own, she is surprised by her own reaction as her gaze becomes almost predatory. God, how long had it been?

"Elizabeth," Kerry starts. "How long have you -- "

Interrupting, Elizabeth blurts out, "Since I first saw you." Then, blushing, she turns away. "I thought you hated me." Turning to meet the soft gaze again, she smiles warmly. "Now I know, you hate everyone -- not just me."

Kerry shrugs off the stinging annoyance that threatens to consume the moment. "I don't hate everyone. I can't be held accountable for everyone who happens to be intimidated by my power and overwhelming desire to get things done the right way." Kerry pauses. "I try to do the right things and all I ever get is -- "

"Would you like to get out of here?" Elizabeth interrupts in hushed tones and Kerry feels her mouth go dry as she replies just as softly.

"Sure." Her green-blue eyes are staring into Elizabeth's gray ones as the two seem to get up from the bar, pay the bill, and exit the diner in a dream sequence.

Hours later, Kerry is standing at her kitchen counter watching Elizabeth Corday take her fourth shot of whisky -- and the Brit is showing definite signs of tipsiness.

"God, I'm so glad Carter doesn't live here anymore," Kerry says as she goes towards the taller woman and grasps the shot glass before it tumbles to the floor.

"Sorry ..." Corday's words come out a hoarse slur, and she covers her mouth like someone who has just burped. "... I'm making an ass of myself. Just kill me now." Her drunken wish is followed by a giggle, and Kerry approaches her and takes her arm.

"Let's just sit first, then maybe I'll consider that option -- if you get too bothersome." Slipping one arm around Corday's waist, Kerry leads them to the sitting room where she deposits the blonde onto the couch and then gets to the stereo, putting on some obscure rock and roll.

Cocking her head, Elizabeth considers the tune, then makes eye contact with Kerry, who is bobbing her head lightly. "Kerry Weaver ... do my ears deceive me or is this a David Bowie selection?"

Shrugging, Kerry comes to sit next to the taller woman. "I have always had a thing for drag queens -- especially European ones ..."

Corday's mouth hangs open, and Kerry laughs at the sight as they sing in unison, "Ziggy Stardust!"

Kerry leans her head back against the sofa and Elizabeth shakes her head slowly, making it tingle a bit. "Kerry, you are full of surprises."

Turning her face towards Corday's she considers that. "I guess I am."

Now, sitting there in Kerry's living room, enveloped in the sound of slightly classic sixties rock, nearly drunk off her ass, but glad of it (for the excuse, in case one were needed), Elizabeth leans over suddenly and presses her mouth to her boss's in a searing kiss. Unsure of how to proceed, Kerry brings her hands up to close on Elizabeth's shoulders, intending to push her away but instead, pulls her closer, savoring the taste of the whisky and the feel of the blonde's insistent tongue.

The weight of Elizabeth's body slowly lounging across her own diminutive frame brings her back to reality as she pulls back, breathlessly and gazes into the gray, hooded, slightly-out-of-focus eyes staring down at her.

"We can't ... we can't do this," Kerry whispers, dodging the advances of the larger woman's kisses. "You don't want to do this."

Elizabeth laughs and says softly, "How do you know what I want? This happens to be exactly what I want."

Kerry involuntarily finds her hand at the impossibly soft cheek of her colleague and begins to stroke it lightly, as the Brit leans into the touch. "For one thing, sweetie, you're completely inebriated. You aren't thinking clearly." Kerry considers her words. "For that matter, neither am I."

Elizabeth brings her mouth to Kerry's again and kisses her deeply before the redhead trails her mouth over the other woman's jaw, murmuring.

"I'm gonna ... call you a cab ..." Kerry says, but makes no move to disentangle herself from beneath the surgeon.

Elizabeth is slowly fumbling with the buttons of Kerry's blouse, and the redhead feels her stomach flutter in spite of herself. "Make love to me, Kerry," Elizabeth murmurs against Kerry's clavicle, and Kerry, unable to take any more of the hot pursuit, uses all her strength to roll the two of them over so she is not pinned down.

Muttering more for her benefit than for the other woman's, Kerry contemplates her next move. "I have to be the levelheaded person here, and do the right thing." She glances down at Elizabeth, who has rolled herself onto her back and removed her own shirt, beckoning Kerry with those slate-colored eyes. "I cannot give in to this ..."

Kerry gets up and searches for her crutch, wiping the taste of lipstick mixed with bourbon off her mouth. Elizabeth lounges on the couch, knees up, arms above her head, humming to herself. "Kerry ..." she muses. "Please come sit with me -- I won't attack you, I swear."

Locating the crutch, Kerry also slips on her glasses, hoping to slip back into the role of Chief Weaver, but it is a difficult task when her body aches this much for the touch of her colleague. "I'm just ... I'm finding the number of the, uh ... cab company."

"Noooo," Elizabeth whines. "I don't want to go home yet."

Kerry links eyes with her and grabs the phone book from a drawer, searching for the number. Dr. Corday has somehow stumbled in from the living room, and she takes the phone from Kerry, replacing the receiver in its cradle. Kerry simply watches her, wondering how on Earth they got to this point as Elizabeth takes her hands and begins to dance with her, slowly. "Let's play a game," she whispers against Kerry's ear in a deep, seductive voice, and in spite of herself, Kerry's interest is piqued. Not only is she totally, completely unfamiliar with any wide range of sexual practices, but for some reason, she's feeling more adventurous tonight than she normally would be.

"Okaaay ... what kind of game?" Kerry asks as the crutch falls to the floor and she allows herself to be engaged in a slow dance. It occurs to her that she has danced with Mark in almost this exact same fashion, but not quite so intimately. The thought sends a pang of guilt through her.

"Let's role play," Elizabeth says before quickly stealing a kiss from her superior's lips. "I am sooooo in dire need of a shag, I've thought of a way to make you want me like you want no other woman."

Kerry rolls her eyes, positive that Elizabeth is just in the midst of a drunken rant until she says something that makes her heart nearly stop.

"Close your eyes and make believe that I am Dr. Legaspi."

Kerry stumbles backward, slightly, and Elizabeth pulls her back again from near oblivion. She is unable to speak, so the Brit holds onto her, tightly.

"I'm serious, Kerry." Elizabeth is at the smaller woman's neck again, kissing her way up. "Think of her. Touch me the way you want to touch her. Let me be her for you. Make love to me like you would her." Elizabeth is murmuring like a chant or mantra. "Please touch me, Kerry."

Kerry is dumbfounded, and tries to ignore the wetness in her eyes. She doesn't really want to do this, but a part of her does. A part of her is aching to try. It is that small part of her that still holds a vigil for Kim's return. When she speaks again, her throat is dry. "And who will I pretend to be?"

Elizabeth runs her hands through Kerry's short red hair and smiles. "You don't have to pretend to be anybody. It's you I want."

With that, Elizabeth brings her mouth to Weaver's and kisses her deeply, darting tongue gently, and a soft moan escapes from someplace deep within Kerry. She is angry at herself for how easily she surrenders where matters of the heart are concerned.

Closing her eyes, she takes the surgeon's perfect, golden hands and holds them at her sides, restraining them, and making sure she knows to keep them there. Now, she slowly begins to feel her way around this body, very different from Kim's in that the psychiatrist had a slender, very toned, muscled form. Running her fingers tentatively up Elizabeth's slightly rounded tummy, she feels the slight tremor of the other woman responding to a ticklish spot. "Don't move ..." Kerry instructs the other woman before trying out the fantasy. "... Kim."

Elizabeth doesn't make a sound, but Kerry can hear as well as feel Corday's breathing become labored. She is so aroused, so on the brink. Kerry is fascinated by this even as she is fascinated by the ‘game' they are currently engaged in. It is strange, but she thinks she can get lost in this fantasy -- if she tries very hard. Mostly, she does it to herself for the challenge. She will deal with the psychological ramifications afterward.

She considers asking Corday to remove her own bra, but decides to just slip her hands underneath the cups without unhooking the Godawful contraption. She has always enjoyed the power she has over people, and she especially enjoys this power as the other woman gasps when her small cool palms gently cup the ripe breasts.

"Relax, Kim," she whispers as she feels the nipples stiffen in her hands, and she resists the urge to roll them or squeeze them. Instead, she just rubs her palm against them, and she can feel the other woman faltering a bit, sighing quietly.

"Kerry ..." Elizabeth hisses between clenched teeth.

"Don't talk!" Kerry snaps, and the other woman shudders in excitement. "Kim does not have an accent."

Kerry once again returns to the task of trying to envision her estranged Kim Legaspi in the body of this distinctive woman before her. It is nearly impossible, and as Kerry's hands squeeze gently at the tightened nipples, she swears she feels a wetness trickle down her fingers. "Jesus," she murmurs, keeping her eyes shut. "Kim isn't lactating, either."

Elizabeth stifles a giggle as Kerry squeezes them harder, and Corday gasps.

"Sensitive?" she asks, and Corday nods even though Kerry can't see her.

Turning them so that Elizabeth is against the kitchen counter, Kerry removes her hands from the large bosom and instinctively licks her fingers, tasting the other woman's essence. The thought of it, the eroticism of it, sends a pang of longing to Kerry's loins. She kneels in front of the taller woman and reaches for the waist of her slacks, slowly unbuttoning them and slipping them down the other woman's long legs.

The thing she notices about Elizabeth is that her body is very soft compared to Kim Legaspi's in the sense that Kim constantly ran, worked out, had sex ... Kerry sighs at that thought. The woman had to do something to make up for the consumption of all those chips. Now, running her hands blindly up Elizabeth's right leg, she pauses to consider her next move. If this were really Kim Legaspi before her, she would probably want to kiss her knees first -- it is something, she realizes, she has never been able to do. Leaning forward, she brings her lips to the tips of Elizabeth's knees, and marvels at how even a simple art form such as knee appraising can cause a sexual tremor to shoot through the Brit.

"Kerry, please ..." Elizabeth has grown impatient, and speaks even as Kerry slaps her flank.

"I told you not to talk," she says, and hears the larger woman releasing a shaky breath.

Reaching up with both hands, Kerry hooks her fingers into Corday's panties and slips them off effortlessly as the other woman gasps in surprise.

Without the aid of sight, Kerry has to feel her way around this woman's body, which in no way reminds her of Kim Legaspi's, but the realization of that is so painfully evident, it is less like an awakening and more like an afterthought.

"I'm not pretending anymore, Elizabeth," she murmurs softly as she cups the woman's buttocks, bringing the pelvis to within inches of her face. She takes in the scent, deciding she likes it, and believes it would be acceptable to dine upon.

"I t-think I'm getting sober, K-kerry?" Corday says, trembling with raw need as the smaller doctor's nose brush against the light dusting of blonde hair at her nether regions.

"Oh," Kerry says, brushing her cheek against Elizabeth's thigh, enjoying the heat, and enjoying the reality of this situation. "Do you think you can make it back to the couch?"

Reaching a hand down to Kerry's shoulder, Corday shakes her head. "Just screw me right here in the kitchen."

This causes Kerry to open her eyes and look at the surgeon for the first time since she's been naked. "God, you're worse off than I am."

Elizabeth slips down to the floor facing Kerry and envelopes her in her arms, kissing her mouth and cheeks and neck. "I have never been this horny, I swear, Kerry ... Mark never made me feel -- "

Kerry hushes the blonde with her kiss and pulls her down to lie on top of her. The weight of her is exquisite enough, but the large breasts are absolute heaven. Kerry bends her head to take one of the engorged nipples into her mouth, suckling gently until Corday is literally begging her for release.

"God, Kerry ... oh God ... please ... more, please. Touch me ..."

Deciding not to waste anymore time, Kerry reaches between them and slowly slides two fingers into the wet, warm entrance as Corday shudders with the beginnings of orgasm. Kerry is slightly amused as she effortlessly brings Elizabeth to her long-awaited release.

"Ohhhhh ... Goodddddd ..." The surgeon groans loudly on top of Kerry.

"Yeeessss?" Kerry responds as if the name belongs to her, grasping Corday's generous ass in her free hand.

Biting her boss gently on the neck, Corday attempts to stifle the scream that threatens to rip from her very depths as Kerry trails her hand up to resume playing with the sensitive nipple just in her grasp. This stimulation, coupled with Kerry's expert fingers, driving slowly in and out of the other woman, is enough to bring about another three orgasms, and after coming down from the last one, Elizabeth is incapable of doing anything but lying motionless on the floor, save for the deep rise and fall of her chest.

Disentangling herself from the larger woman, Kerry feels around her on the floor for her glasses before locating them, putting them on her face, and getting up to retrieve Elizabeth a glass of water.

"Elizabeth?" she says softly, kneeling beside her, brushing the sweat-slicked hair from her face. "I brought you some water. Your electrolytes are way low."

Corday sighs before opening her eyes and sitting up a bit. Before she takes the water, she regards Kerry with an almost indignant statement. "How would you know about my electrolytes?"

Bringing the glass to her lips, Kerry smiles warmly as she responds, "Well, you've lost a lot of ... umm ... ‘fluids.' Sweetie, you've been coming for the better part of an hour."

Elizabeth's statement is wide-eyed over the top of the glass as she downs it effortlessly. Kerry stifles a chuckle and takes the glass away.

"Have we really ... been at it for that long?" Corday sits up and stares at Kerry, who is nodding. "I can't believe you're still dressed, and I'm ..."

Kerry shrugs. "I know, but I think we've done enough damage for one night -- agreed?"

Reaching for the smaller woman's neck, Elizabeth pulls her in for a deep kiss. It is a kiss filled with the passion of forbidden lovers, and it only serves to remind Kerry of her own need for release. She pulls back to stare into the blonde's eyes.

"I'd better call you that cab." Kerry says softly, her voice coated with practiced restraint, but Elizabeth isn't going to let her off that easily. She pulls her towards her and wraps her arms around the tiny waist, intending to relieve the chief of her slacks. Kerry is unsure how to proceed, but silently allows herself to be pushed gently onto her back.

The floor is hard and cool as goose bumps rise on the redhead's shoulders, and Corday is kissing them with their light dusting of freckles. "You're remarkable, Kerry," she breathes, slowly making her way to the smaller woman's breasts. Unceremoniously, she slips Kerry's bra up to reveal beautiful porcelain breasts whose tips stand dark and erect in the cool air of the kitchen.

The gasp is involuntary, and she doesn't expect the warm wetness that closes on the nipple almost immediately. She reaches her hand up to tangle in the disarray of blonde waves that is the surgeon's hair.

"Elizabeth ..." Kerry breathes the name as she strokes the larger woman's back with her free hand. The suckling sensation is sending the chief into a frenzy. "God ..."

Elizabeth returns to the task of relieving Kerry of her slacks and panties, slipping them over her hips and down her legs.

"I've never done this before, Kerry," the blonde murmurs while kissing the flat plane of stomach before her.

Kerry sighs, trying to ignore the warm tongue darting playfully in and around her navel. "I'm new at it, m-myself." She is barely able to complete the sentence and reaches down to grasp Corday's mane of hair again for leverage.

Now, Kerry feels expert hands stroking the insides of her thighs, gently before feeling the practiced glide of four fingers entering her -- she gasps and presses into the protrusion. "Oh God ... that's ... nice..." Kerry moans as Corday gently strokes in and out of her and simultaneously kissing the soft breasts, torso, and abdomen.

"I want to try something," Corday whispers after several moments, removing her hand from the warm sanctuary that is Kerry, much to the chief's dismay. She groans softly at the loss of contact before nearly raising off the floor when the surgeon's tongue meets her aching center.

"Jesus!" she squeals, breathless as the other woman's tongue seems to know just where to touch. "Oh ... God ... Corday ... yessss ..." Her pelvis is off the floor, pressing into the insistent tongue, and it only takes a moment before the orgasm overtakes her, sending her spiraling towards her sweet resolution ...

Hours later, they awaken, to the sound of someone's pager going off, a bit stunned to find themselves tangled naked together on the floor of Kerry Weaver's kitchen.

Kerry reaches over the larger woman to find her glasses before locating her slacks to which her pager is attached.

"County," she murmurs before linking eyes with her colleague. Corday grins slightly as she watches the blush overtake Kerry's face. "I guess we'd better ... um ..."

Elizabeth nods, knowingly.

Together, almost awkwardly, they set about the task of gathering their clothes, silently and going to the bathroom, separately. When Kerry emerges, wrapped in a terrycloth robe, hair dripping wet, she watches as Elizabeth approaches her.

"Kerry ... I ... I really enjoyed what we ... what happened." Elizabeth is stumbling over her words as Kerry shoves her hands deeply into the robe pockets and regards the Brit.

"I enjoyed it also," Kerry replies simply, lips curved upward slightly.

"Well ..." Corday is trying to say something, but is obviously finding it difficult. "Listen, I know I'm not what you really had in mind ... I mean, I know I'm no Dr. Legaspi, but -- "

Kerry shushes the blonde with a chaste kiss. "Please, let's not go through that again. There is no way I could ever presume to envision her in you ... but after last night ..." Kerry pauses to consider her next words. "... after last night, I wouldn't want to. I made love to you, Elizabeth -- not Kim."

Corday feels a tearful swelling in her eyes brought on by the overwhelming sensation of being wanted, and perhaps, being beaten at her own game. Kerry strokes her cheek gently.

"For now," she says in the wake of Elizabeth's stunned silence, "let's just concentrate on getting to work and try not to think about what we tell Mark when he realizes we've spent the night together."

Kerry winks as the other doctor suppresses a giggle, riddled with anticipation of what the future might hold ...